|Alpha One site||Home||How it works||Reviews||Shop||Contact Us|
"Male vibrator is a brand new tool for wanking your cock! Does it work? YOU BET IT DOES! We'd gladly sacrifice a leg to get our hands on a machine of this masturbatory magnificence!"
"This is absolutely fantastic, I have bought loads of pumps in the past and this beats them into the ground. This has got to be the male equivalent of the Rabbit Vibrator."
"An excellent device which still had me shaking for 10 mins after coming."
"The smart man's sex toy. Unlike simple, no brain tubes you stick your old boy in and rub it up then cum. The Monkey Spanker represents some very far out lateral thinking and to produce such a unique and highy effective device - Monkey Spankers we salute you."
"Ace! Boyfriend loved it, tonnes of fun, best birthday prezzie I got him."
"This is a must have for those times when you have to do it and there is no one around. (10 / 10)"
Best Male Product I've Tried Yet
Reviewed: by tommy07
I've purchased quite a few toys from Lovehoney now and I know there will be a lot more!
This toy is amazing when used to 'work' the penis while receiving a blowjob. I always hand this to my wife while she's sucking my cock.
Use some lube with it and the small surface area which grips your penis makes a blowjob even better, if that is possible.
No matter how rough she gets with me while using this it doesn't hurt, and the toy hasn't torn or shown any sign of tearing.
The bullet vibe changes the experience of the toy too.
It's very easy to clean and is also good when used by yourself.
Spank that monkey
I bought this toy because I was intrigued. The inside circle is a thin rubber, and with a little lube on your cock it slides up and down brilliantly. Sliding all the way up from the base and over the frenulum is fantastic.
The little vibrator in the handle is so powerful and won't fail to bring anyone to orgasm.
Monkey Spanker Male Masturbator amazing
I am an older bloke, 60. Have not cum for years due to a problem from a vasectomy 28 years ago also heath and general wear and tear. Have tried other things and methods to no real avail, but this little baby, after the second time of use, had feelings and muck shooting out and has done with each use.
Invigorated or what? Have a form of sexual life back. Slow and fast, one area or the whole shaft, take your time and the pleasure grows and shoot for the stars. Even the moments after ejaculation, the pleasure lasts if you keep it on. I have also been able to stir the chap from its slumber to an aroused and wanton hardness. Use lube and the pleasure is silky smooth.
I am, you see, delighted with the Monkey Spanker. I feel sure you will be also, if you buy one. Don't be just tempted. Get one.
I had seen this when I was passing some time on the net, thought it looked like it would be a good buy so I ordered one!
When it came, I opened the packet and straight away knew it was going to be enjoyable.
Off came the trousers, out came the lube (lube is a must have with this) and on went the Monkey Spanker. When I first started to use it, I was not sure about it; it felt good but not as good as I thought it would.
I then got the hang of it and my god, it felt good! Soon after I came all over the place! So different to using your hand - it's less effort for more reward, which in my book is worth the money.
It arrived this morning and I have used it 3 times already, I am in love with this thing!
My Mrs has not had a go with it yet but I think this will be even better as my hand will be free to roam!
My boyfriend was getting a little upset with the amount of toys I I'd bought for myself, so I thought I'd treat him for a change! Personally I don't like the look of the more explicit male toys so, as I was paying, I thought this looked perfect!
It comes with batteries, which is great as I'd forgot to get any....sorry!
The other reviews have given detail on how it works solo and I can say that feedback from my boyfriend has been equally complimentary, so I thought i'd let you know how good it is for sharing.
I am blessed with a well endowed boyfriend, so I used the Monkey Spanker at the base while giving him a blow job. The use of a flavoured lube all along his cock helped the Monkey Spanker slide and the movement of the toy delivered me a ready supply where I needed it!
We moved on to him holding and operating the toy while I gave some attention to his balls and it was great for me to have my hands/mouth free for some ass play. I really enjoyed being able to see him getting some attention on all of his hot spots at the same time.
Visually, I liked being able to see his cock, unlike some of the other toys that hide it away. It also allowed the "money shot" to be directed onto me rather than being contained within a tube or having to break the flow in order to take it out!
Other reviews have explained all about it and how it works/what's best etc. Each to there own of course but for less than £20 this is the best for me, I can't leave the damn thing alone! I'm not fussed about vibrating things so don't use that aspect. I haven't used my hand since getting this last week and use it two or three times a day. I just get my favourite pics out and off I go! I'm spunking so much I may end up shrivelled like a prune ha ha.
It's good, perhaps a little too good!
This wasn't that expensive so I threw it in the shopping basket when I made my last order just out of curiosity. I have used Fleshlights for a couple of years now with great results. They are fantastic, but require time to warm up and then clean. This is perfect for when you want to go solo and can't be bothered with or don't have time for anything better.
The experience is similar to a Fleshlight, or even real sex though your penis isn't surrounded with the Monkey Spanker. It needs lube to work, it would be tight and painful to use without! I found that if I got too keen and worked it quickly it tended to throw the lube around the room which wasn't ideal. Slow down though, and not only does it stop making a mess, but you get a better experience.
The vibrations aren't very strong, but you can notice them and they add an extra dimension.
Clever Little Monkey
Reviewed: by tinks18, an Engaged Straight Female
The OH begged me for this product for Christmas so I tried to keep this as a Christmas present but let it slip one day that I already had it so had to put it into good use!
Initially I used it just as an extra for a handjob, yet after some experimenting we used it for sex and blowjobs. The feedback from the OH was brilliant. 'Amazing' is the word he used to describe it. It was really easy to use on someone (I know a few of the reviews have been from solo players!) and the silicone head easily slipped over the other head!
We put some lube onto the OH's penis and off we went. I wouldn't recommend putting lube onto the toy first of all. Lube does tend to collect on the silicone part but I just wiped it off.
The vibration was just right for my OH and quite nice for me too when I was straddling him and using the toy at the same time!
It was super easy to wash and keep clean, just warm water and some soap :)
Long-lasting fun for all
Outstanding! I'll begin with the one negative point. It took me several attempts to correctly insert the batteries into the bullet. It's not made immediately obvious which way around they go and they're not easy to handle. It's quite a fiddle to get it right.
However, once it's all set up correctly it's a brilliantly effective product. With some self-control and switching between having the vibration function on and off it's possible to enjoy the sensations for a considerably long time prior reaching a climax.
The product itself has a pleasing feel to it both in terms of texture and tightness - just how tight it is surprised me. It's very easy to use once on - but you do need to apply a reasonable amount of lube before you begin to masturbate and be prepared to add more lube during actual use. (It also works very well over a condom if you like minimal clean-up afterwards.)
Finally, it's a very easy product to clean due to the simplicity of the design.
I highly recommend this toy - you'll not be disappointed.
Another amazing variation with the Monkey Spanker is to actually use TWO monkey spankers! Don't worry about the cost - it's worth it!
Rub plenty of lube into the cock, particularly the top of the shaft then slowly slide the 2 monkey spankers over the head of your penis, note - this definitely works best when you're really turned on and your dick is very hard - you can in fact wank yourself almost to orgasm before using the spankers like this. OK, so nice and slowly slide the monkey spankers up and down the top of the shaft - this really is so close to a blowjob feel. Then rotate the spankers - slowly and in different directions - and move them up and down whilst rotating. At the same time - occasionally sliding over the head of the cock.
Words can't describe how amazing this feels! It always looks pornstar spectacular as well! The special cock-hugging latex draws an intense and satisfying squirting orgasm! Try it.
Intense orgasms guaranteed!
This is one incredible piece of kit! Firstly, make sure that your cock is fully erect and use loads of lube for best results. I find that baby oil does just fine. It works best with gentle up and down motions just below the head of the cock at the top of the shaft. It usually produces a good deal of pre-cum with me!
The little vibrator that comes with it is so-so; what I'd recommend though for the best orgasm is to use an ordinary vibrator held firmly to the handle of the spanker whilst gently moving it up and down your cock. This truly is an amazing feeling and gives me the most mind-blowing orgasms imaginable. It always makes me shoot my spunk a good distance! Very satisfying and it's great value for money!
Can't wait to have another go!
If you're looking for a male sex toy but never really saw the appeal of sleeves, I'd very strongly recommend the Monkey Spanker.
I've never got on with sleeves, it always seemed like such a faff, slightly creepy and awkward to clean. I only used it a handful of times, and most of those only because I thought I should after spending money on it. The Monkey Spanker is much cheaper, I've used it once and I actually WANT to use it again.
You just lube up, pop it on and off you go. With the Monkey Spanker you get a distinct ring of pressure which you can move up and down the whole shaft or just over the head. It's true that the bullet vibe doesn't really add much to the experience other than noise, and if you don't hold part of one of your fingers against it, it'll make a very loud noise as it rattles against the hard plastic. If it was closer to the business end of the toy rather than in the middle I could see it'd make a difference, but as it is I'll probably not bother with it.
That said, I still think the Monkey Spanker is a very enjoyable toy that's easy to clean and that I'll definitely use again and again. I'm even wondering whether you could use two at once, one in each hand, one on the shaft and one going over the head.
Takes some practice
Hmm, the Monkey Spanker certainly feels different to any other sex toy I've tried - and in a good way.
For me it took a little getting used to because I had a hard time finding my sweet spot but when you do find it it's a good ride.
The toy provides a tight but comfortable grip around your shaft and you can control the movement yourself, anything form slow and steady to fast and hard. Truly spanking the monkey!
I find fast and hard with plenty of lube provides the best pleasure for myself but everyone will differ.
The orgasm this thing provides is always stronger and more intense than normal, which is great.
I recommend this toy to all the men who like to add something extra to their alone time ;)
Spank away till you can't spank anymore
Well I read the reviews and thought yes I'll have one of those. Now I've got a few toys, and a couple of masturbators, which 30+ years of using the five finger shuffle, they certainly add a new dimension to the solo loving thing.
When it arrived I was keen to try it out, who wouldn't be! So I ran upstairs, stripped off and got the lube out.
Right let's get the practical bit out of the way first. You do need a fair amount of lube both on both sides of the silicone ring, and plenty along the full length of your cock.
I would say that the more you use the better the experience. Oh yes a good erection helps. Unlike sleeves, you have a very small contact area to your cock, so if you're a bit 'floppy' or not at least 80% hard it's not going to work well.
Certainly the silicone ring expands around your cock well, if you're more than average girth it might be a bit tight, but no problems for me. Certainly the normal up and down motion was different from other masturbators, and took a few minutes to get used to.
I tried it a few times now, it certainly gets you off without any difficulty, the vibrations from the little bullet are nice without being OTT.
For the price it's certainly worth having one in the drawer, maybe not for everyday use but nice to have a change every once in a while.
Fun for both of us!
1st one received was fault and Lovehoney kindly sent another one out to us :-) Boy was it worth it!
My hubby loved it! Found it a very nice fit. (Use lots of lube to get it on!) The vibrations were fantastic and I found it a lot easier then normal to pleasure him - it's brilliant to use during a blow job or hand stimulation. Saved myself from arm ache!
He came a lot faster than normal and, even better, once he was finished he popped the vibrating part out from the back and used it on me!
The vibrations when used on its own are very strong and I found it fantastic!
Very happy :-)
Hot, messy but fun!!!
I have just received my new monkey spanker and have to say I'm pleased with it. The center part is soft, very flexible and slides easily over my penis. I'm circumsized so it moves easily along the full length of my shaft. Although there is a vibe part, I have already dispensed with this as the impact is very minimal. In saying that, the sensations are intense and different to hand stimulation. Be prepared to use lots of lube with this one as it won't do the trick if everything gets dry. Also... be prepared for a mess as come loads, even before you climax, especially if you have a long session. The sensations are such that you may have loads of pre-cum. This and your lube will be pushed in to your pubes but hey... what the heck. Lube is important, and can easily be added during stroking by pouring some on your glans, and flipping the monkey spanker over after a few further strokes. This was you will delightfully spread your lube (or saliva) all over your shaft and glans. I have pleasured a few times for over twenty minutes and have no chaffing or even soreness. The pleasure and stimulation is also gentle enough to allow you to continue stroking over your glans for a few minutes after you cum, giving gentle but acute pleasure for these glory strokes. It feels pretty much like nice tight vaginal sex, or a stiff blowjob.
Send us your review to firstname.lastname@example.org